We punch above our weight down here at the bottom of the world. We are the rugby champions of the world; the rugby league champions of the world; we make it to the World Cup of Association Football with a pool of 22 players to choose from (and then draw against the current world champs) to name but a few of our many sporting accomplishments.
A couple of days ago the New Zealand cricket team (The Black Caps) beat the Australian cricket team. In the bigger scheme of things, this is not earth sha
I've only just returned to the site today and learnt of the sad news about my friend and yours, the incorrigible Gaius Octavius Bathroom Attendant.
This man was my first friend here - we gave each other shit and he invited me to be on his friends list. From there, he basically gave me the lowdown on Nephele and other people who became my friends, but GO was the first and he maintained that friendship even when I didn't.
His jokes and pictures clogged my inbox. Not to mention his insults. Afte
Friends and fellow scions of UNRV! I have a new job. Less hours, less work, more money, more responsibility. I'm happy in the new job, but where we work there is no TV coverage, no Internet, and no Cell Phone reception. These are minor trivialities really, because the job is on a tropical island building a new resort. It's a three month contract running a labour crew of twelve, a really easy gig bar the technological difficulties.
The major drawback is that I can't get to UNRV much these da
It's been a while, but I'm back having a nosey around UNRV to see how everything is hanging. Since my last blog I have discovered a new passion; FISHING! I'm fuckin' HOOKED on it, pun completely intended.
A close friend gave me a fishing rod and reel and then sat back to watch my too-cool-for-school indifference turn into complete and utter obsession in seconds flat.
I'm absorbed completely by this pastime; it has outdone reading, rugby league and music in the interest stakes. I don't k
I honestly meant to have a quiet birthday this year. No; honestly I did. I was going to hide away from my alcoholic mates and read a fuckin' book.
But it didn't turn out that way. It is impossible to stand in the way of friends whose mission it has become to drink you under three of four tables.
We'll just get one bottle, they said. Just the one. And maybe a box of beers. Or two. We might as well get some Vodka, too....
Six bottles of Bourbon, one bottle of Stoli, three boxes of beer, nine
Excuse me if this blog rambles. I'm mothered.
Myself and a very good friend of mine decided to make this christmas a Heavy Metal Christmas (throw your horns up!!). We donned our favourite, mankiest metal t shirts, mine a tatty, holey Slayer jobbie, my friend's a Motorhead T shirt that is still resplendent with bloodstains from the last time Motorhead visited these shores. We dug out the doc martens and the chuck taylors. Only music of the metal ilk could grace our stereo; Slayer, Motorhead, Chi
I got promoted! This is the first entry of my first ever blog on the net. Thankyou UNRV, Primus Pilus and anyone else important whose arse I may have neglected kissing. I love this site, and this is a signal honor in my opinion, even if to other more experienced people it is 'just a blog' and a ho hum kind of achievement. Not to me, mates. This is the shizzle.
I'm writing a stand up comedy routine at the moment. There is an open mic at the local comedy club next month for new talent (read victi
I've been through a whole heap of painful crap in my life, more than most people I know. I have always subscribed to the belief that if it the pain isn't enough to kill you, it can only make you stronger.
I honestly thought that given all that I've been through, I can get through any kind of pain that comes my way.
How sadly I misled myself.
My children will soon be moving with their mum to another city, far away from me. I'm hurting about it, real bad, and so are my three beautiful little
Me and a mate did something that I was very proud of last night. Let me regale you.
Working through the wee hours as I have been lately, I have lunch with a friend at about 4am. We work in Auckland City, so wander down to the town square, which is called Aotea Square, to watch all of the early morning freaks out and about as we munch and swill coffee. I've seen some funny stuff sitting in the square. Last night was not so funny.
We went to take our usual seats and we heard a woman screaming. I
I had my first go at Stand Up Comedy last night.
It could've been better, but then again, it could've been a whole lot worse.
Luckily, there was your archetypal drunk-guy-who-thought-he-was-hilarious on before me, and he made me look good, and I was able to take the piss out of him mercilessly and get more laughs. Later on I bought the guy a beer, not out of pity, more out of thanks!
My routine was based around lampooning race relations in this country in the main and I was glad to see that
Salve all of my friends from UNRV!
Over the weekend, something monumental happened that you may not be aware of.
The Kiwi Rugby League team won the World Cup from Australia!
This is bigger than Obama. This is bigger than the financial crisis.
NEW ZEALAND ARE THE WORLD CHAMPIONS AT SOMETHING!
It may not mean a bean to any of you, but I don't care. I get this little warm feeling when
I think of our team smashing the Aussies at their own game! I'm happy for the next five years
until we get
Hey! I'm back, for those of you who care.
The job is finished on the islands and the resort that I was working on but they wont upload. I'll keep trying so you can all see where I've been at and be appropriately jealous.
I hope everybody has been well and all is good in your lives. God, I missed UNRV.
Great to be back!
Yesterday my brother got married to his childhood sweetheart. What a day.
I've attended four weddings so far this year and I'm still no more enamoured of the idea. Familiarity is breeding contempt. What a freakin' production. I was happy for my brother and his new wife, but when you hear the phrase 'your special day' what I reckon is really meant is 'the bride's special day'.
What is it about the day of marriage that makes perfectly reasonably, sane, women turn into slathering egomaniacal cont
I've been working nights for the past months, and in that time I have come into contact with a building site administator who has the people skills of a flesh eating virus.
I'm Maori. There is a popular perception here, long held and deep seated amongst the ignorant, that we are not very bright as a race. I deal with this every working day and try to change perceptions.
The fact that I am a labourer does not help me. It kind of reinforces the aforementioned perception of me and my people. I d
The Old Dude
I've decided to give up football (Rugby).
This is a sad, sad day for any self respecting traditionally Kiwi male. I'm the 'Old Dude' on my team, and now even outright spite and denial cannot keep me going. I stopped playing Rugby League (Rugbys more brutal cousin) three years ago because I was getting too many injuries. Now I'm hanging up the boots for good and I feel like less of a man because of it. Since I can remember, Saturdays have e'er been the same. Get up early, go and
