Its the Chinese New Year, and since they haven't been inflicted deeply by the economic downturn, today they've been celebrating. It also happens to be Year of the Ox which is good news for me, because in Chinese astrology that's me - I'm an Ox. There you go, I've admitted it.
Get Away From It All
Australia are advertising for a guy to run Hamilton Island, a tropical paradise, in a deal involving free flights, feeding turtles, collecting mail, scuba swimming, running a Hamilton Island blog,
Weathermen do love it when things get interesting. Our current spell of fine weather is about to end, and as always, the man on tv grinned mightily as he warned of impending wind and rain. Okay, okay, I heard you the first time, change the cript, please...
Today is still sunny. A bit cooler though, and actually the breeze is quite chilly.
I was strolling along the local high street on my to the programme centre. A young woman in a red car swerved across in front me, mounting the pavemen
I woke this morning earlier than I wanted - another job interview today. As usual, the bedroom is mildly cold but probably warmer than the front room! Anyhow, I threw back the duvet, shudderred in the loss of warm air, and tip toed to the curtains for a look outside. Snow!
It snowed last night. Not a huge blizzard by any means, more of a thin coat of that fine wet snow that quickly clogs and becomes frighteningly icy. We don't usually get any snow in January. These days, we tend to get a lig
With all this wintery chaos going on you people out there must be suffering terribly. I feel it is my duty, and honour, to bring a little amusement to your otherwise frozen lives. So without further ado, at great risk to life and limb, I bring you todays blog entry...
Todays Blog Entry
The snow was falling most of saturday afternoon. Not heavily, but persistent. Worse still it was wet snow, creating a slippery surface on top of asphalt or compacted snow from the previous night. As I looked
There's always been a certain amount of sexual cross-over in human societies. Most cultures have stories of woman who take on mens roles. We read of a female samurai, capable and deadly. We read of women hiding amongst the ranks of redcoats pretending to be boys. The native americans, of the plains tribes at least, tended to accept that not all men wanted to be warriors, and if a man wanted to stay in the camp and do womens work that was his choice. And so on.
Today we see all sorts of mani
It was such a lovely afternoon yesterday that I couldn't help taking a wander around some of our local open spaces. I was in the mood for a break. The aggravations of job searching seem especially aggravating right now, simply because it feels like I'm trying to wade upstream right now. After nearly two decades in warehousing you would think I'd learnt a few things, but apparently job agencies regard me as lacking the necessary experience. Pardon?
Anyway, that's enough of a gripe. The weathe
Today was another session at the Work Experience Programme, in which we are supposed to fit a jobsearch in between the various group activities. I always find this very frustrating because what I'd like to do is turn up and get on with it, without all these infant school distractions.
Todays distraction was about presentations, and our group (composed of the noisier elements of the class, myself included) were given a brief to assemble a presentation on facilities and assistance for drug and
Without wishing to sound like a tired old blues singer, I woke up this morning. After almost four years of unemployment I consider that a demonstration of my self discipline and work ethic. Hmmm... Let's see... What shall I do today?
As it happens I woke up this morning to a bright sunny day. There's a very lazy feel about the town as I stroll down to the library, quite unlike a typical monday morning, and the streets are much less busy than usual. Knowing the british as I do, I wouldn't be
This is ridiculous. Now that I have to sign on the dole every single working day, my usual routine is upset. I don't know if you've noticed but my blog has mutated into a television critic webpage, and I'm gaining weight because I'm just not active any more. Seriously, I have this notion of turning up to my signing slot tomorrow with my pack and hiking gear.
I can just imagine a caustic "Going somewhere Caldrail?"
Oh hi Mr Claims Advisor, yeah, I'm off hiking when we're done here, why n
What a miserable, rotten, rainy day. Sorry to go on a downer, but it just couldn't be any greyer. A fine drizzle driven by blustery winds is definitely dampening my spirit. But Yahoo has the answer. Twelve tips to brighten your otherwise dreary day. Okay. Let's have a look.
1. Resist the urge to
Last night, during the small hours, I went to the back of the house to answer natures call. Whilst there, I became aware of a loud conversation between a group of lads out the back. The car park is sometimes used by passers-by so I didn't think too much of it... until I realised they weren't walking past.
Open the window... Just a tad...
They were standing beside the corpse of my Eunos Cabriolet discussing events leading up to its abandonment. Not just the car either. Informed opinion wa
Human beings are creatures of habit. We soon find a comfortable routine in any enviroment, finding a way of life that suits us just fine. Why then do we worry so much about lifestyles?
Everyone likes to suggest how we ought to live. Religion has been doing that for thousands of years of course. It's no coincidence that churches and temples demand attendance and regular prayer. The government very kindly makes lots of rules to persuade us to adopt their own sanitised version of behaviour. Not
Women are such fickle creatures. In Newcastle, the opinion of one young lady who passed me by was to say "Ooh not him, he's fat" Now that I'm officially fat, I can no longer attract women in Newcastle. Sigh. Scratch Northumberland off my list.
Yesterday afternoon I took a stroll down that road where all the posh houses are, the one that leads to Coate Water. A group of ladies jogging in their lunchtime began discussing my finer points. as they approached in the opposite direction. That conve
On another website I came across some collected video footage from the Korean War, mostly concerned with communist aviation. It was interesting to watch. I don't know a great deal about that conflict and this was the early days of the jet fighter, who were still fighting with WW2 tactics lacking sophisticated radar and 'beyond-visual-range' missiles.
Now what comes across is the speed involved, which really shoudln't suprise anyone, but when you consider that at this time the Sound Barrier r
It happens today. it's inescapable. And it will cause suffering and hardship.
That's the message I've been seeing and hearing in our media. It's a womnder there's no-one wandering back and forth the local high street with a placard saying "The end is nigh". I am of course referring to the imminent assault upon british shores of another arctic blast.
It's now late morning and if I were honest, there's little sign of our impending doom. The sky is sombre with dark grey clouds under a ligh
"Cooo-eee!"
Huh? What? Hey, I'm just stood at a pedestrian crossing minding my own business in my usual semi-comatosed state.
"It's me!" Said a young woman who clearly knew me. I think I was supposed to know who she was. Oh hang on... Finally I realised who she was. Mr J's girlfriend, the human pinball. Here we go again...
To my astonishment she was sober and behaving in a normal friendly manner. I don't think I've met her in that condition before. When slightly inebriated she descri
British weather struck with a veangeance yesterday. Not quite the heaviest downpour I've ever suffered, but it kept on raining heavily all day. I have an army issue rucksack - officially declared waterproof -which had a small puddle at the bottom of it. My mobile phone got trashed by water damage again. Why can't manufacturers make a mobile phone that doesn't disintergrate in mildly moist conditions? Worse still, having already been out in the rain and well soaked, I found a message left by the
I've decided that television is an insidious device created for the sole purpose of keeping people off the streets. As you probably guessed, I was kept off the streets last night. probably no bad thing mind you, as Swindon streets are certainly no better than anyone elses.
This morning I watched a team of hi-vis clothing walking the pavements measuring distances with little wheely things. At first it occured to me that our local council might have realised the streets exist and that they ne
What should a man believe in? A soldier would say you should believe in yourself. A politician would say believe in his vision. A christian would say believe in Jesus. It seems then that there is a choice of what you can believe, and inevitably, there's always persuasion or pressure to conform to someone elses ideals. In some situations, conformity is understandable. A soldier does what he's ordered to do because life gets very uncomfortable if he doesn't. You generally do what politicians want
Walking home from the College I was confronted by a dog. The black labrador trotted along the pavement happily wagging its tail, at one with the universe as dogs sometimes are. The owner, an older woman, was blissfully unaware of my approach and stared out across the valley. The dog stared at me. I get the impression it was a somewhat dominant animal as it veered toward me, curious as to why I wasn't stepping aside for it. One quick sniff and it lost interest. Obviously it didn't consider me a t
My neighbour was not happy. He left for work this morning by slamming the door, which results in the house moving slightly. Seriously, it does, you can actually feel the movement caused by air pressure.
Not only that, but passing lorries on the road outside make the house shake. Worse still, the vibration causes my bedroom door to rattle, and that, I suspect, is what kept my neighbour awake and got him all riled up. Even my usual strategem of wedging a plastic bag under door made no differen
Festive season or not, I am still unemployed, and therefore my jobsearch continues. It's continued for so long now that it seems almost like a job in itself. As long as I achieve my targets and objectives on a regular basis I get regular pay. In fact, the only real difference is that instead of one all important boss, I attend an office full of them. Or at least it would be if I could get through the door.
The programme centre has a push-button intercom through which you must attract someone
Today I'm setting aside my usual commentary on the World and its problems, and shall therefore describe events in a normal Caldrail Day. You know the sort of thing, that blues song..
7:00am - Wake up.
7:01am - Roll over and go back to sleep.
8:30am - Neighbours go to work.. wardrobe doors banging.... giggling and shouting..... Car starting up and driving off....
8:35am - Garage across the yard opens for business and the yard fills up with customers cars. Engines making all sorts
The misery goes on. In very un-swindon-like style, the snow started again last night and as I glance out the window of the library, it's just begun cascading down in thick torrents. Our local council now has only two days of grit reserves left to clear our roads and keep Swindon moving.
I'm biting my nails.
Weather Update of the Week
Oh. Its just reverted to that thin sprinkle of fine drizzly snow. Panic over. Phew.
Life in urban England is often portrayed as a struggle against ignorance, decay, violence, and theft. I've made the same noises myself sometimes, so I guess there's a little truth to it, having witnessed the depressing state that society sometimes gets into. Of course there are those who want to stop the destructive tendencies in our midst. A worthy cause, or perhaps a cause to further someones poltiical career?
The trouble with dealing with problems of this nature is the uncompromising resp
