I was in a grim state last night. My temperature was rising, my visits to the toilet increasingly frantic and frequent, and I felt dreadful. Why is it that medicine never tastes nice? Grin and bear it, Caldrail, you'll feel better in the morning. And so I was. The cold damp morning didn't put me off at all. After the heavy showers of yesterday, the big screen television bolted to the side of the multi-story car park insisted today was going to bring drizzle. I think they might have a different d
There was a general lack of managers at work today. Under normal circumstances that would be a recipe for noise and mucking-about, but with my dole payments in doubt I had other things on my mind. I even had to go to the Job Centre this afternoon to force them to arrange my 'Back To Dole Seeking' interview. Talk about DIY.
Meanwhile, back at the stockroom, the quiet atmosphere was making it possible for others to attempt a spot of entertainment. Somewhat carelessly an asian lady started sing
One of the most intriguing human speculations is the sixth sense, the extra sensory perception, the pyshic ability that some would have us believe is a latent talent lurking in the dark recesses of our brain. It's been the fundamental idea behind plenty of fiction, television, and film. Can we really reach out with our minds and become aware of things our mundane senses don't perceive?
In europe there's a guy called Bronnikov that tells us we can. He was the subject of an investigation by De
I woke to the alarm clock this morning as I suspected I might. That's the price you pay for staying up late. I now have half an hour to get dressed and down to the job centre to sign on. Inertia is a terrible obstacle first thing, amplified by the frigid temperatures that only a siberian would scoff at. No, it's no good, I have to get out of bed.
Having fallen listlessly sideways onto the carpet, I was suddenly aware that I was risking hypothermia unless I moved. Move I did. In fact, I was
Sunrise, sunset, Sunday, Monday.... Yes, Swindon has reverted to ordinary greyness. There's a sort of comfortable familiarity about layers of dismal cloud drifting across the town and never letting it be one thing or another.
It's been a suprisingly quiet start to the year. I only heard the first police siren wailing past my home on saturday night. Even Punch & Judy, fresh back from annoying someone else on their christmas holiday, have been quiet and mindful of the fact that thanks to t
That's it. I've had enough. After a few years of not writing any computer programs at all, I've discovered how much I've forgotten. There's a command phrase I need and I can't remember what it is. It's a strange irony that help files are no help whasoever when you don't know what you're looking for.
After spending a fruitless hour in a quest for digital enlightenment, I decide that I've had enough. Switch the darn thing off and get something to eat before I starve. So I stomp despondently in
Over the years I've met people on internet forums. We all say that. The truth is we haven't met them at all. They're just little icons and text messages from people far far away. How well can you know someone on a website? That's difficult to say. If there's one thing the internet allows, and indeed one of it's greatest dangers, is the anonymity of it. You can invent a persona and people do exactly that.
Time and again I hear stories of 'women' being unmasked as male teenagers (Good grief,
Yo ho ho mee hearties, 'tis blowing a gale and the seas be rough. This be weather to sort out the landlubbers from old sea dogs. Haven't seen a good squall like this since last year. Batten down the hatches boys and break out the rum. Ye'll be needin' it fer the journey 'ome... Ha ha harrr.
They promised foul weather this morning and delivered on it. It is horrendous out there. For old sea dogs and parrots only. Wooden legs available while stocks last.
From the Window
A few days ago I w
The sound of heavy breathing made itself apparent as I sit here in the library. Poor chap sounds like he's going to expire of a heart attack before he gets to the second floor. I do sympathise, having to climb stairs all day at work too, but he's going to need oxygen at the top of this climb. He does make it to the top of the stairs, waddling slowly onto each step with weary persistence.
Hang on a minute... If that was such a physical performance, why isn't he breathing deeply and resting?
Yesterday I was slightly greener than the day before. Nothing to do with imminent nausea, or envy at the Maserati that drives down the hill every morning, but compliance with the detailed instructions our eco-friendly ex-government foisted on us. Now that I can't simply leave unwanted bottles for the dustmen to collect, I must dispose of them responsibly myself.
My old kitbag was bulging with unwanted glass, making dull chinking noises as I walked down the hill toward the car park where I k
A lovely sunny morning. It really is. Mind you, despite the sunshine, when I left the house earlier today it was very chilly, clouds of breath marking my progress, and if it hadn't been for my steady pace, I would have felt the cold very quickly.
Today was upposed to be the day I started my forklifting course. Some people people might not appreciate how momentous this opportunity is. I sepent nearly two decades in warehousing and no-one would train me on forklifts. That's what you get for dr
Once more unto the Job Centre, dear friends, once more...
Apart from my regular signing days I sometimes get called in to attend a more serious interview. I think that's just in case I've charmed the pants off my advisor and get away with all manner of shenanigans. As if. Most of the time I feel one step away from a cancellation of payments and believe me, the Job Centre's do that on purpose. Maybe it's right that they should in that claimants shouldn't get too attached to claiming the dole
Hot... Too hot... Music being played in the park....
Oh stuff it. I can't be bothered to type anything out. Sunshine does this to the british. My genetic compulsion to laze immobile whilst being slowly cooked is too strong to resist. Bye for now. See ya tomorrow or something...
With my long suffering PC now deceased, I find myself with a lot of time and no means to occupy it. Socialising? Not any more, my bank account is in danger of floating away, if anyone still remembers me that is. Music? Well why not. I now have some time to get a little much needed guitar practice.
As it turns out, I've had a chance to play a somewhat expensive guitar, one of those 'Explorer' style instruments (if that means anything to you) that is twenty five years old. I've heard it said w
Miss L isn't speaking to me today. The enormity of the situation is soul-crushing. How can I go through life without Miss L's insightful commentary? I have become a lesser human being, relegated to the bottom league of social undesirables on slave wages. Plus I get attacked occcaisionally by rubber bands and rubbish thrown over the racks. Battered and bruised.
In order to restore my happiness, and indeed, my general sanity, the department store issued me with a high-vis jacket. For health a
I woke bleary eyed after the Star Trek marathon on television this weekend. No, before you ask, I didn't have anything better to do. I've been pretty critical of the films by and large, so you have to wonder why I bothered. Put simply, there were one or two I've never seen and it's been a while since I saw the others.
The major thing that struck me was the obvious. The early films try to create a sense of magic which just doesn't work. It's as if just having the old team from USS Enterprise
Most of us do dumb things at times. I used to hear work colleagues confidently claim that they never made mistakes, but they did, one being an attempt to convince the management that they were superior workers. That sort of mistake is due to poor decision making and to some extent, a deliberate risk.
The rest of us, sooner or later, foul up. Yesterday I did that magnificently. You see, when I get sent on these courses on how to search for jobs, I'm also obliged to attend a follow up intervie
The wind is blowing. The rain is falling. What a horrible morning!
Solo Music
A couple of nights ago the BBC had a bit of a Robert Plant fest. Concentrating mostly on his solo career after Led Zeppelin, it was a curious tale of musical experiment including a hilarious commercial phase in the eighties. I've had some respect for his efforts in the past - Slow Dancer from the album Pictures At Eleven has always been a personal favourite among many - but I wasn't aware of the variety of music h
No, don't worry, I haven't discovered Jesus just in time for Christmas, and quite honestly, spending christmas day in a stable full of smelly farm animals with a screaming baby doesn't sound like heaven to me. No, I have a different nightmare....
Heavy snow has hit Britain again and the usual wintery chaos has begun. Homes without electricity, roads slippery, the whole country grinding to a halt. Except Swindon, which once again is blissfully free of the stuff. That means cars can travel fre
After my daily stint at the library it was time to pop down to the supermarket for a few items to keep my stomach from rumbling. The street was busy as usual - Ooh look, there's that woman sat at the cafe opposite, staring at me again. Either she's an investigator for the Department of Work and Pensions (Ridiculous but these fantasies make my day so interesting) or she's stalking me (I'm going to find boiled bunnies in my flat before long - I just know it). It might just be I got up this morning
It's a properly celtic morning today. Cold, certainly, that sort of insidious damp chill you can never feel warm in whatever you do. I look out the window at the pale blue sky, static undulations of blue-grey alto-cumulus tinged with gold, and that grey claggy horizon with a distant mountain range of cumulus far off in the west.
It's also a very quiet day. Sundays are sometimes like that, and with these dull grey mornings you usually get a very subdued response from people. One old chap said
When I was a very young child, I saw that old comedy film where two steam engines collide head on. Without special effects, film makers in the twenties had no choice but to either show a lot of steam or do it for real, and that once, they did. I don't remember, but apparently I burst into tears. I suspect Hollywood wanted a different reaction but then again we british have always had a love affair with the steam locomotive. The news of a collison between trains in India doesn't reduce me to tear
You would never know it was August. It's as dull and chilly as late Autumn. Not only that, with our recent strong winds, some trees are convinced that Summer is over and are shedding brown leaves everywhere. You feel like shouting "No! Stop it!" but you just know the trees aren't going to listen to some gesticulating and noisy ape descendant.
'C' That?
Remember the Sinclair C5? Those of you who can't, it was a sort of sports model mobility buggy. available in any colour as long as it's whit
Picture the world in prehistory. No television, computer games, or cars. In between hunting wild beasts I guess they had a lot time on their hands. So bored was one ancestor of humanity that he discovered rubbing wooden sticks together made things catch fire.. Can you imagine how excited he was to discover that?
Later, when voluminous wigs were fashionable, Newton discovered that sitting under apple trees was not only painful, but seriously enlightening. Sometime later, Einstein discovered t
The plan was to head for the hills and spend the day wearing myself out on the ridges of the Marlborough Downs. On the way I took it into my head to investigate a corner of the local countryside I'd never strayed into before. The grass was incredibly thick. The blades were almost six feet long, though not standing upright, growing sideways in thick layers of the stuff. I've never seen anything like that in England before.
After ten minutes of wading through that lot, I was knackered. It was
