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Lifes Little Jokes


caldrail

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Walking home from the College I was confronted by a dog. The black labrador trotted along the pavement happily wagging its tail, at one with the universe as dogs sometimes are. The owner, an older woman, was blissfully unaware of my approach and stared out across the valley. The dog stared at me. I get the impression it was a somewhat dominant animal as it veered toward me, curious as to why I wasn't stepping aside for it. One quick sniff and it lost interest. Obviously it didn't consider me a threat.

 

The woman noticed I was held up by her beloved pet. I shrugged and quipped "What could I do?". I'm not sure the dog was amused, but at least she guffawed.

 

Damp Spot

On a friendlier note, I met a white Husky yesterday, one of those sled dogs that apparently make difficult pets. Those pale blue eyes are a bit spooky and when you look into it's gaze, you see a wolf staring back at you far more than most breeds. As it turned out, the dog was very good natured. Or so the owner claims. All I know is that it had a good sniff of my nether regions when I chatted to the owner and left me with a damp patch on the front of my trousers. Cheers. Thanks for that. Must be some kind of Arctic greeting. Or perhaps the Husky has a very canine sense of humour.

 

Sour Note

One person without a sense of humour was the girl on the till at the Asda supermarket. Those wretched card readers and their sponge rubber keypads are never reliable and this one simply refused to enter my numbers accurately. You need that looked at, I said, the keys don't work properly.

 

"Works for everyone else." She replied with that really irritating air of social superiority. Look, lady, you're a shop assistant, not a wealthy businesswoman. The customer is always right. And whilst on the subject, I didn't find you attractive either. Sometimes my sense of humour gets a little strained too.

 

Joke of the Week

I didn't invent this one, credit goes to A, one of my fellow college students.

 

How do you know when you're an electrician?

 

When you decide whether to park your car in series or parallel

 

If you didn't find that hilariously funny, you need a course in electrical awareness. Or a sense of humour. Or high voltage wires applied to your person. If that doesn't work, I know a branch of Asda's that would suit your shopping needs exactly.

 

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If you didn't find that hilariously funny, you need a course in electrical awareness. Or a sense of humour. Or high voltage wires applied to your person. If that doesn't work, I know a branch of Asda's that would suit your shopping needs exactly.

 

Now I feel bad... :D

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Did you hear about the electrician who crossed the road? He shorted himself out....

 

A scotsman, an irishman, and an electrician queued for a bus. The scotsman asked how much the bus ride would cost. The irishman asked where the bus was going. The electrician told them it wsn't plugged in.

 

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? More than the estimate.

 

Feel better? Laughter is the best remedy.... :D

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