Sunny Saturday
Entry posted by caldrail
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The sunshine is glorious. It really is. Not a cloud to be seen and for a warm saturday surprisingly quiet in Swindon. You would think the place would be humming with people out to enjoy the day but apparently this isn't the case. I wonder why? Is it the recession? Has anyone got any money left after Gordon Browns Tax Police have slapped bills on everything that moves and almost everything that doesn't? Or is it the danger of collapsing walls at our plentiful building sites, following this weeks shock horror near-disaster (saved only by the scaffolding knocking against a lampost)?
Me Tarzan, You Recycle
Tarzan is coming back. Our jungle dwelling loin-clothed knife wielding gymnast is making a comeback. Ah yes... I remember Johnny Wiesmuller shouting "UNGOWA!" to scare off lions and rolling with rubber crocodiles in muddy water. But that, I'm afraid, is the old Tarzan, a horrible politically incorrect quasi-victorian macho figure who doesn't belong in our more sophisticated and ecologically concious world. Yes, you've guessed it, Tarzan is going green. No, not ripping his shirt off at the first sight of Nazis colonising african film-sets, but a new eco-warrior to meet the needs of the modern day, fighting against loggers and hunters and generally being very caring toward animals that once used to be so ferocious and aggressive back in the thirties/forties.
Jane will be there too, this time with an I-Pod. Just the sort of handy gizmo you need for survival in the rainforests. Hang on a minute... Where does she get the power for that device, I wonder aloud? The manageress in the stockroom rest area looked up from her copy of Russell Brands autobiography and said "Maybe it's solar powered?". Of course. How stupid of me. Just ask the woman in charge. She'll know the answer. Me Tarzan, You know better.
Somehow I don't think this new Tarzan will work. I sort of guessing he'll have a modern intellect and a cute line in gags (in between bouts of stand offs with greedy corporate exploiters). I hope he's not squeamish. Jungles have lots of insects. Looks like he might have his work cut out protecting Jane from the dangers of jungle life... Or am I being too sexist? Too stuck in a bygone era? We know who wears the trousers in african jungles these days.
More Disquiet At The Library?
A few times in the past I've mentioned the unwanted noise that some people generate in libraries. I'm going to mention it again, largely because this is saturday morning and I haven't got anything else to write about. The number of times some woman has parked her offspring in the next cubicle to me and ignores the frantic and confused efforts of her child to communicate with the world around it. And naturally, being ignored just makes them louder.
The impromptu business meeting is taking place on the other side. Two middle aged guys concentrating hard to figure out how to access this or that and what it actually means. neither really knows but they try to convince each other they know. Each points at the screen and reads off the text to the other in an attempt to make the other understand what it means. At least they're too busy talking to use mobile phones.
Young asian lads are the worst for using mobile phones, far more casual and ubiquitous than teenage girls. There's one now, chattering away in that sort of monotone gibberish, making deals, catching up with gossip, maybe even plotting the downfall of the western democracies for all I know.
A bald headed chap wants to sing along to the mp3 he's downloading but obviously that wouldn't be appreciated, so he sort of whispers it in a tuneless chant. It seriously is creepy and I don't think he realises how loud he is.
Then there's that big guy who always sits near the top of the stairs. Quite a jolly chap, but he gets so wrapped up in the videos he downloads of boxing matches. Everythings quiet... Just a background rattle of computer keyboards... "GOO ON MY SON!" He roars in appreciation, and adds "Can't beat a good fight."
He might enjoy the one he's about to get with Dragon Lady, the scottish librarian who doesn't stand for any of that noise malarkey. There's going to be blood...
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