Jump to content
UNRV Ancient Roman Empire Forums
  • entries
    131
  • comments
    378
  • views
    96,361

"no Honey, I Don't Feel Like It Tonight...."

Viggen

Entry posted by Viggen

661 views

 Share

I had this today in my inbox, and thought its pretty funny... :ph34r:

 

This was written by a guy... it's pretty damn smart. Girls -- Have a sense of humour! I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women diffe so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

 

 

FOR EXAMPLE:

 

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear... "You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?" Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

 

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

 

We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

 

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

 

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it." Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,

 

"WHAT?"

 

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

 

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that girl knows I'm smarter than her.

 

Alright girls. Repost this if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, forward it.

 

Men, repost this because you have balls.

 Share

6 Comments

Recommended Comments

Pertinax

I seem to remember a very recent survey as regards the "attractivness" of men , for some reason it boiled down to how much money they had regardless of , say stomach size or witty conversation.......

Link to comment
Gaius Octavius

Yup!, Pertinax. Those babes ain't dumb, even if a recent study by some Brits found that men are some 3 percentage points smarter. :ph34r:

 

As for that poor luckless chap, mayhaps there was another reason - one for his head to decipher? :ph34r:;)

 

:P

:P

Link to comment
Moonlapse

*chuckles* If I wasn't married... I'd still probably live in a studio apartment, sleep on the floor, and own only as much as I could fit into my car... which I'm totally comfortable with. :ph34r:

Link to comment
Ursus

I seem to remember a very recent survey as regards the "attractivness" of men , for some reason it boiled down to how much money they had regardless of , say stomach size or witty conversation.......

 

 

All too true. And the higher one gets on the socio-economic scale, the more pronounced that particular attitude.

 

But hey, we're all Romans here, and we realize love and marriage are not synonymous, right?

Link to comment
Gaius Octavius

TRUE STORY!

 

 

Blonde IN THE KITCHEN--Brutal!!!

 

She is in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.

He walks in. She turns and says, "You've got to make love to me-- this very moment."

His eyes light up and he thinks, "This is my lucky day."

Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraces her and then gives it his all on the kitchen table.

Afterwards she says, "Thanks," and returns to the stove.

More than a little puzzled, he asks, "What was that all about?"

 

She explains, "The egg timer's broken."

 

:ph34r:

:ph34r:

Link to comment
Gaius Paulinus Maximus
TRUE STORY!

 

 

Blonde IN THE KITCHEN--Brutal!!!

 

She is in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.

He walks in. She turns and says, "You've got to make love to me-- this very moment."

His eyes light up and he thinks, "This is my lucky day."

Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraces her and then gives it his all on the kitchen table.

Afterwards she says, "Thanks," and returns to the stove.

More than a little puzzled, he asks, "What was that all about?"

 

She explains, "The egg timer's broken."

 

:ph34r:

 

:rolleyes:

 

Been in that very situation myself but it's safe to say that the egg was VERY hard boiled................we are talking concrete!!! :ph34r:

Link to comment
×
×
  • Create New...