Women In Charge
Entry posted by caldrail
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I don't usually like to sound sexist, but I've decided that after many years experience, women bosses are useless.
Why?
First is DG. She rose to power on the basis of impressing the male managers with her knowledge and expertise of our database workstations. Actually I don't think she knew that much - she was just better than most of making a big thing of it. Anyhow, she became the warehouse manager. All very smart and efficient, but she never left her office. The whole warehouse got to the point of collapse when she emerged one day and asked - "Whats going on?". She was also the person who left a briefcase in the foyer and sparked off a bomb alert involving police, the fire brigade, and a bomb disposal team from the army. Ok, everyone, you can go home now....
Or BB. Bless her. She was a rising star in the offices and they brought her into the warehouse for experience. One day she gathered a few of us long-timers and sat us down. "Right" She said, "I want you all to oversee stock control, and I want to sit down together each day and discuss any issues and resolve them amongst each other, and..."
I stopped BB in mid flow. B, I said, whats the point? There's no issues to discuss and if we need anything, we just ask someone. BB stared open jawed at the alien concept of co-operation, then said "Yes, but I want you to discuss your issues....."
Lets not forget DS. A dizzy blonde who cannot retain her balance in social situations, a woman for whom no frivolity was beneath her. A woman who turned the office into a practice range for elastic band missiles, whom I personally wrestled for possession of her golf balls (which she had been banging on the desk - why? What did you think they were?). A woman who sacks anyone who doesn't join her crowd of admirers, and a woman who has spent time in psychiatric counselling (nicknamed the 'Nutty Club' by us minions). A woman who believes a Vauxhall Vectra is a desirable motor car. Luckily she's also got a memory span that a goldfish would pour scorn on so now that she's sacked me, I can relax safe in the knowledge she's already forgotten me.
How to be patient
The telephone rings. I fall off the seat clumsily and pick up the receiver to speak with a bemused delivery driver who can't find my address. Not too suprising, since the address was incorrect. Is that typical for imports through Ireland? No matter. The driver was given the correct address, and I awaited my software eagerly.
At 15:00 hours (approximately) I begin installing the package. Gone are the days of multiple disks and hefty instruction manuals, all you get now is a DVD.
At 16:45, I realise the install procedure isn't going to be quick. Good job I'm patient. The progress bar has hardly moved. I decide to wander off and do something else in the meantime.
At 21:38, the install dialog brings up a message saying "Processing Help System. Help is being installed. This may take an extended amount of time". My desk soon develops several dents and my head hurts...
00:35 and all is well! Its installed! Yahoooo! (thump) zzzzzzz.....zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.........
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