There's a tree in Savernake Forest that I know of. An unremarkable tree at first glance until you discover how old it is. That old fella was sprouting out of ground, fresh from the seed, roughly the same time William the Conqueror was striding ashore at Hastings.
That day in 1066 changed everything. From that point forwards, England and France would be uncomfortable neighbours, no doubt made worse by the Germanic roots of the Anglo-Saxons. Of course now we're on good terms, despite my succes
Noisy pensioners...
Noisy youths...
Noisy kids...
Could it get any worse? Well yes, actually. Now we have noisy strikers. Council workers are on strike for two days to get bigger pay rises than oil tanker drivers, and so the libraries are shut. They're all lined up outside council premises with printed placards (I wonder how much that cost?) declaring their strike action and calling for public support. They haven't got mine at all.
So its off to the local internet cafe and spend
Cue upbeat theme music and close ups of scantily clad women between clips of Caldrail goofing
Hi there, and welcome to Eye on Rushey Platt. I'm your host Caldrail. In todays entry -
Did Miss L do that to her hair on purpose?
Why has AM been banned from his favourite library PC?
Does DS know I've heard her mocking me as she walks past my home on Friday night?
Is there any truth to the rumour that SB is about to get his revenge?
But first, a shocking new development down th
War seems to loomed large on the television screens of late. Not just the tragic deaths of six british servicemen in Afghanistan, or the equally tragic killing spree of an american NCO, or even the revelations of terrible things that happened in the Libyan Revolt or are happening now in the Syrian troubles. It was also wars of times past.
The usual war films are playing regularly in the afternoons. Brave british chaps stiffening their upper lips in the north african desert, or americans free
What on earth is happening at the library? The day care centre children are quiet, well behaved, not singing tunelessly nor pretending to be aeroplanes. Everyone else is quiet too. AM hasn't whinged all morning. Everyone else is staring slack jawed at their emails.
Well I'm not going to be so stationery. I've recently begun to jog. You know, that keep fit nonsense, although I should point out I jog outside the library, not in. Well I had to really, I'm getting a little tubby and being this a
When I was very young I used to come across the vast seies of books published by Ladybird. Little handooks, lavishly illustrated with paintings, covering just about every subject you possibly teach a child. One has stuck in the mind for some strange reason. That scene where a dishevelled beggar by the name of Marco Polo claimed he had just returned from the orient to jeers and laughter, then bringing a stunned silence to the crowd as he ripped open his clothes and revealed the treasure in gemsto
I found out a big secret this weekend. Stay tuned to learn more.
Party On Dude
Saturday was the official museum social event of the year. Normally this sort of thing takes place around christmas or new year, but us museum folk take life at an easier pace, except for Mr J's hyperactive girlfriend who was clearly never taught how to behave in polite society. So we we stood there sort of drunk and confused while she turned into a human pinball.
At one point in the proceedings she was compa
Every year the English go one better than spending a weekend parked on a Bank Holiday motorway. They go on their summer hols. I always find it remarkable that the English generally regard the rest of the world as their playground.
The most popular playground for many years has been Spain. Now up until now I always thought this was because Spanish hotels were so unfinished that it didn't matter if drunken English tourists wrecked them. We English do like to remind other countries of our victo
And now on Channel UNRV, we go deep into the rainforest as Caldrail Attenborough presents Planet Alleyway...
(Cue theme music and titles)
Hello. I'm Caldrail Attenborough, and this is a typical back alleyway in the depths of the rainforests of Darkest Wiltshire. In the next hour we'll looking at the rich variety of wildlife that exists in this remote corner of England, and hopefully, we'll discover some of the more exotic and reclusive creatures that live in Planet Alleyway.
We enter
Sometime around dawn this morning I woke knowing my day was going to busy. Normally at this time I groan, roll over, and go back to sleep. Today I don't have that luxury, so it's out of bed - Gah! Cold! - and a quick dash to the bathroom for the daily ritual of turning myself into a human being again.
First
Now for a stroll down to the Job Centre for my daily signing. They told me to come in at a certain time, but neglected to tell me the place was closed for an hour due to staff meetings.
A bright and early start for Caldrail this morning. My quest to discover the causes of my health issues now leads me on a major expedition into the countryside where Swindons hospital now resides. Of all the daft places to build one it's miles out on the fringe of wilderness. At least there's a footpath all the way there. Someone thought of that.
The Great Western Hospital has attracted a poor reputation of late. As far as I could tell, the staff were efficient, courteous, and very helpful,
Todays post on my blog is something of an obituary. My computer, a veteran of many hardware changes, has finally succumbed to a nasty virus and expired yesterday aged nine.
One point of view is that it's merely a machine, one that can - eventually - be replaced. Up to a point that's correct, assuming you can afford one that is equally reliable and capable over just short of a decade of hard use. The issue isn't the hardware however, but the software collected on it's hard drive. Over the cou
Why? Why did they do it? Why did they make Ed Milliband leader of the Labour party? He makes you wince every time he stands in front of a microphione. It isn't the first time the Labour Party have made an odd choice. Remember Michael Foot? Probably a great guy, but not the man future prime ministers are made of.
Politics is a funny game sometimes and I can't help wondering if the sole reason Eddy Baby got the job was to stop his oolder brother David from achieving his ambition. He was disap
You don't have to look very hard to find stately homes in englands green and pleasant land. So prevalent was the landscaped parkland of the 18th century that people believe english countryside is supposed to look like that. Therefore to get our cultural fix, we english people sometime visit these stately homes and their pastoral surroundings.
I've been dragged around a fair few stately homes as a child. They all seemed to be the same. Pastel labyrinths of grandiose furniture and anonymous po
Swindon is suspiciously white this morning. Even winter-safe wiltshire has finally succumbed to snow. It started last night and quickly reduced wiltshire to the usual scene of british ineptitude of dealing with slippery conditions. I watched a van attempting to ascend the steep side street behind my home. Even with a guy shovelling ice from under the wheels they made painfully slow progress toward the company yard.
For me it means another struggle with my sense of balance as the partially cl
Apparently farmers in Sub-Saharan Africa will benefit from detailed digital maps of soil nutrient quality. At last they'll know why their farms are not doing well. Isn't technology useful? Perhaps not, considering the Skycar, a para-sailing dune buggy, currently setting out on a three thousand mile journey across Africa. These skycars are ridiculous. They proved it was a daft idea back in the fifties. Can you imagine the telephone calls from frustrated motorists?
"You have reached Traffic Co
Every so often I'm summoned to the programme centre for a job searching session. I don't mind doing that, but the hassle is that their network was set up by a company from Ireland. No, really, it was. So consequently nothing works.
Is the printer working? The young lady hosting the session confirmed that it was. At last! Useful too because I need to print stuff off and I'd rather not have to find a public facility costing me ten pence a sheet. Open the document... Click on 'Print'... Huh?
It's Bank Holiday Weekend in Britain again. Those of us not busy demolishing our properties with ideas for home improvement will be heading for the coast, a mass migration of people desperate for fun and sun away from their daily grind. The government have issued a warning to those intending to travel that they can expect long delays on trunk routes.
We know. Everyone knows the motorways get jammed up with cars every Bank Holiday Weekend. But then, since the government have made our lives du
For the last couple of days the weather has been interesting. One minute the sun is out and everyone is relaxed. The next a massive spread of towering grey and white cumulus unleashes rainfall on the unsuspecting. I had to shelter in a doorway two days ago while one downpour opened up. Not only rain, but hail mixed in. Ten minutes later the clouds drifted away to reduce someone else to a drowned rat. Now I can go about my business again, safe in the knowledge that my school swimming certificate
Has anyone been watching the Tour De France bicycle race this year? No, me neither, but I did catch that extraordinary accident on the news later that evening. A camera car swerves and takes out two or three competitors before driving off. You can sort of tell it's France because in Britain there'd be four police cars boxing the escaping driver in and cops hauling the driver onto the tarmac before cuffing him to exciting music and a witty comment on the voiceover. No really, I've seen it on Poli
One of the joys of opening my post box every morning is the flyers and handouts that fuill it. After all, most of the letters I get are no more than rejection letters from employers, so it gets a bit depressing reading them. Thanks for the application, you're not shortlisted, please don't feel upset or suicidal, and apply again whenever you like. I'm starting to think the post service is making bogus job adverts to keep their members in gainful employment.
The flyers are different. Some are
Have you seen that Tom Hanks movie about being marooned? Its a lonely vigil, here in my safe warm cave on Washout Island. Every day I do little else than send messages in bottles hoping an employer will come across it and send a boat to bring me back to civilisation. One bottle came back on the morning tide with a note inside saying - You haven't done the first bit. Oh? Whats that? Light signal fires? Jump up and down at passing aeroplanes yelling very loudly? Becoming intimately familiar with a
Once again the weathermen have triumphed. The storms have crossed the west country overnight and left us with a wet and rainy day. In fact this rain is a bit unseasonal, but at least it wasn't a hurricane.
By chance I was watching CBS news last night. I wouldn't normally bother because for some reason I can't fathom, american news channels are almost unfathomable. Not this time. The arrival of Hurricane Irene was causing worry for everyone living on the east coast and it seems weather of tha
In some ways I'm lucky. I'm just old enough to remember seeing steam locomotives working mainline services on British Rail. Steam engines have this animistic quality which endures despite the nerdy image of those who like them. As for me, I've always had a soft spot for this powerful works of art that belch smoke and hiss and chuff... Well, you know what I mean. The distant sounds of whistles still draw my attention. I remember this forgotten world. All those sounds behind rows of trees, the exq
I happened to spot a document in the reference library yesterday. It's a glossy colour planning proposal for Swindon's eastern development. Basically, Swindon is a town built on the left of a north/south road, the A419, which follows the route of a Roman road. Now they want to build on farmland to the right, the east of the A419. It's certainly a large development and clearly another step in the road to making Swindon a 'city'. Is that a good thing? The local politicans of course have pound sign
