Todays blog entry is devoted to the subject of bigness. Is it a good thing? Upsetting a guy bigger than you is always a risky venture, one of the first and most important lessons we learn as children. I remember a photograph of a protestor at a fuel refinery many years ago getting the shock of his life when the irate lorry driver he was obstructing turned out to be considerably bigger than he was.
The issue of bigness is inherent to human beings. 4x4 drivers rely on it. The sheer size of the
Now this is a much warmer day. After a thirty minute walk to the programme centre I was sweating.
"Lovely day isn't it?" Said the young lady on the front desk. How she noticed that buried inside her air conditioned laminated trench is a mystery to me. Oh look, now I'm getting sweat all over the floor...
My mentor popped into the foyer to collect me with her usual polite cheeriness. She also mentioned what a nice day it was, and obviously concerned at my sweaty face enquired whether I had
Not an especially nice morning. Damp and dreary, another Monday, and despite the elation of getting my PC going - or more accurately, going when it can be bothered - today just doesn't have that 'Get Up And Go' feel about it.
Of course my Uncle, now sadly deceased, would have said I wasn't a 'Get Up And Go' person. I think he was wrong there, but I have to confess his determination to find a job when he got made redundant was the stuff of personal heroism. So I must concede his point and cal
In the good old days when men were railwaymen and cars came without pillows in the steering wheel, I used to hear english spoken. It's true. These days official forms come in fifteen different languages and young people don't understand each others slang any more. People wonder why I don't go on foreign holidays. Are they serious? Not only do the Department of Work and Pensions not pay me to enjoy myself abroad, they invite every other country's inhabitants to live next door. Sign on the dole an
Of late the news in Britain has focused on the market town of Wootton Basset, just a few miles down the road from I live, which has the burden of being the nearest habitation to Lyneham Airbase. That's where our fallen soldiers are returning to home shores from foreign entanglements like Afghanistan. So with the recent jingoism to whip up public support for the campaign the town is regularly featured as lining up to watch funeral corteges crawling past. The place has become synonymous with obser
In my foolish innocence I quaffed one of those high energy drinks last night. No sleep for me then. I did manage to get a couple of hours rest in a semi-comatosed state when the drinks effects began to wear off. There goes the alarm clock. I seriously, seriously did not want to get out of bed. It was only the start of Miserable Monday...
Getting To Work
For me the journey to work is a matter of several hundred yards, so no problem there. This morning though I was accosted by a confused old
DING!
If I'm not mistaken, that was the doorbell. There I was, snoozing happily under my nice warm duvet, and someone has to go and spoil it by ringing the doorbell. It might be important, you never know, though a part of was wondering whether someone had broken my car again. I've reached the point where I don't care too much.
Okay, let's find out what's going on. It dawned on me that doing so meant getting out of bed. This had better be good. Switch the hallway light on so the visitor k
Aww not again... The guy downstairs has fired up his expensive state-of-the-art hi-fi and the carpet is vibrating. At least he's not pushing the volume as high as he had. Trouble is, whilst I can't hear the music as such, the bass frequencies travel up through the floor and its literally going right through me. I don't feel like another confrontation, so I need something to take my mind off it.
Its not as if I can read a book.in these circumstances. Walking out the door and socialising is on
Despite the threat of heavy rain it looks like this years RIAT airshow at nearby Fairford will go ahead. It's a huge and popular event. Ticket admittance only this year just in case they need to reimburse everyone. I don't much like fariford as a flying display. The prospect of seeing lots of aircraft you can see every day of the week doesn't appeal, especially since you have to pay a heavy ticket entry and face aggravation on the roads getting in and out. But to anyone whio is going there, I ho
There's an old chap I sometimes see by the cenotaph on Regents Circus. He stands there, breadcrumbs in hand, and allows pidgeons to clamber all over him, and I do mean, all over. He is swamped by the birds clamouring for his limited supply of titbits. Not my idea of fun, but each to their own.
I was passing his favourite spot the other day and noticed a crowd of hungry pidgeons milling around a pile of breadcrumbs on the ground. Hang on... Have they eaten Pidgeon Man? Oh no!
One of Lifes
No sooner had I asked where the wet weather was than it turns up on my doorstep. It's a dreary dull morning here in the rainforests of Darkest Wiltshire, though I should say it's stopped raining just this last few minutes ago.
It seems I chose the right day for my hike. Yesterday I stopped for a breather in a small out-of-the-way field to enjoy the sunshine and the little enclave of rural bliss that is Horse Meadow. Four horses quietly grazed elsewhere. White, bay, black, and a curiously uns
Black holes are the stuff of sci-fi legend. Inescapable gravity carries with it a dread of inevitable disaster should that malignant object ensnare your vessel. Some stories talk about passing through a black hole to distant parts of the galaxy, though quite how you pass through an object that couldn't be physically denser is rarely explained. I found a more serious explanation of black holes in a science magazine the other day. Interestingly, scientists are trying to find ways of researching 'e
And what are the my stars today? What does the astrological alignment of the heavens have in store for humble Caldrail?
Let your childish side come out and play today, dear Libra. Your dreams are
in full force so let them lead the way. Enjoy light-hearted conversations with
friends about the latest movies and the articles in your favorite magazines. You
might want to consider going shopping or getting a haircut as well. This is a
good day to improve your general appearance overall. Y
Lately there's been a few dictators receiving redundancy notices. As if unemployment wasn't bad enough already. We seem to regard dictators as a modern phenomenon but if you think about it, there's always been aggressive nasty individuals who rather like throwing their weight around. Something imbedded in the human psyche means that although we usually co-operate as a society, there's always going to be one or two individuals who want to run it.
That trait doesn't always mean politics. Crimi
About six months ago my boss, AD, threw me over the side and sailed away into stormy waters. Well, he just rang me. Again. Apparently he's under the illusion that I work for one of the companies he deals with.
No, AD, I'm unemployed.
"Oh... Ah.... So.... How are you?"
Unemployed.
I think the old guy is slowly losing it. Apart from the fact he's still employed beyond retirement and driving around in expensive luxury saloons. It does make you wonder how the old ship is doing....
I dropped down to the library this morning... Whaddaya mean you thought I might?.... anyway, I turned up a little earlier than normal and although the foyer was open, the rest of the building was closed off with a folding door. The security guards religiously open this barrier three minutes after opening time, every day. This morning it seems even that task was too onerous. No guard was in sight.
Eventually a pair of librarirans bravely decided to open for business. They went into the small
According to Jeremy Clarkson, the demise of the supercar is nigh. His romantic goodbye to petrol-guzzlers on Top Gear nearly had me bursting into tears. What is life, without passion? Let's face it, those ultra-eco-safe hybrid cars are about as passionate as yesterdays warmed up breakfast. There's something horribly socialist about the modern world. It's even showing signs of communist mediocrity and conformance. The world want drivers to be slow, safe, and silent.
On the one hand, I have to
270 to 264 BC
My capital was Capua, south of Rome. Also I started with a colony on Sicily. I had every intention of conquering the entire island for Rome's glory. It seems the Senate anticipated this and urged me to attack Syracuse, a great metropolis under the control of the Greek Cities. Start as you mean to continue then.
Rapid recruitment ensued and my reinforcements arrived by sea from the port of Ostia. There was a minor scuffle with sicilian bandits who soon succumbed to our swords.
According to a recent survey by an employment website, only 14% of people ever end up in their dream job. What they haven't asked is how many of those 14% succeed at it. As a confirmed member of the politically stronger Failure Party (86% of the vote at the last count) I would like to point out getting your dream job is only half the battle, and that keeping it is sometimes a little tougher. There is of course the old wisdom that you should beware of what you wish for, and that the grass is alwa
One of the great certainties of life on the dole is that you adopt a routine just as much as if you were working. Only you don't get a company car.
My routine is very simple these days. Some people will say I need to get a life, others that I don't know I have one. Some will say that I'm a Has-Been, others that I never have been. They're all wrong of course. But if you don't have money, then your richness of life must be found elsewhere.
I now find some of my richness of life at the loc
The news last night had a breaking story of a mid air collision between a light aeroplane and a helicopter over the Hudson River, resulting in the tragic deaths of nine people. How? With the entire sky to fly through, how is it that two aircraft can collide like that? The truth is that it's all too easy.
In the earliest days of commercial flying, just after the First World War, a new regulation to pass on the right was brought in to prevent head on collisions when following linear features l
The big red van slowed to crawl outside my home and drove onto the pavement so as not to obstruct the road. I hope there's no policeman around, because usually they give drivers parking on the pavement a right ticking off, like they did to the television repair man the last time he called. As it happened, the delivery driver handed me the expected parcel and I had to sign electronically on this wierd gizmo of his.
Now, at this point you're probably expecting me to shout yahoo! and jump about
I grew up during the Cold War. There were air raid sirens mounted on tall posts around the town, something I realised as a schoolkid although most of my friends were unaware of it. As a child I was hugely interested in aeroplanes and I remember those recognition manuals with grainy black and white photographs of those curiously gothic Russian military jets of the 60's and 70's. Of course I never saw them flying. I never saw them at all. That's no coincidence.
Some years ago I was hiking down
I've done it! I've made to the end of the week! Doesn't sound like a particularly brilliant achievement, but with my bedroom temperatures reduced almost to Ice Age conditions, I was starting to worry about becoming extinct. After all, the neanderthals, who were better adpated to the cold than we are, failed miserably to survive their frigid bedrooms at all.
Talking about them, there a new theory why they died off. I've always put it down to old age and poor sex education, but apparently my t
My search for gainful employment continues. Here in Britain we have job agencies, people who sell people to companies as employees. I don't know about you, but thats perilously close to slave labour in my view. However, the reality is that if I want a well paid job, then I'll probably have to do business with them. Then again there are job agencies and there are job agencies. Some inhabit plush air-conditioned office, others have small dingy first floor rooms with coffee making equipment that wa
