War & Loss Of A Country
Entry posted by tflex
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It seems as though every 15 years or so, a war breaks out in my country of origin, Lebanon. Yes, I was there taking my summer vacation on July 12, when all of a sudden everything reverted back to the chaos and the mindset of the 15 year civil war that devestated my country, and cost 150 thousand lives out of an average of 3.5 million people during the war years.
Reflecting back on the 18 days I spent there this sizzling July, I find it amazing how the human mind works. It's sort of like the terror alert system, you can switch it to adapt to a summer vacation of lazing around on the beach & drinking vodka on the rocks, and in literally a fraction of a second it switches into survival mode when there is a threat, like it would if suddenly you were getting chased by a hungry lion.
For me it was like a flashback of the 80s; when the first bomb exploded in the distance that late July afternoon, immediately, my first instinct was to run for the mountains which are about half of a mile away from the coast, where I was sitting with my cousin. And once I would get there, I would take my position next to the artillery operated by my old friend, and cling onto that Kalashnikov like it was my highschool girlfriend; only there was no Kalashnikov, no mountain barracks, and my old friend living in sunny Australia thousands of miles away; yes, it finally hit me, the Phalangist or Christian resistance was dead in Lebanon! Now, 'we' the former warriors of mount Lebanon, the guardians of the cedars are nothing but spectators to a war between one of our former enemies Hizbullah, and our former ally Israel. Thats when I realized the only place I could run to was the shelter. I finally had to accept that the anceint people of Lebanon have been defeated by the foreigners residing in our land, and forced to emigrate by the thousands a country that has a new Islamic makeover and identity. Sadly, the demographics back this up, we went from a majority, to 50%, and now 38% of the population. We no longer have a source of arms, no real politcal support domestically or internationally, and our potential fighting men (18-40) leave everyday for greener pastures, I'm one of them, for I know it's a lost cause.
If Israel is on the front lines of the war on Islamic fundamentalism, then we were behind the lines resisting everyday until the last bullet, which we eventually ran out of after 15 years of fighting our hearts out, unfortunately, the odds were stacked up against us. Personally, I was only actively involved in the latter years of that war, and also the most devestating years as a young teenager, and I haven't fired in anger on an enemy since then. But, on that late July afternoon 2006, I felt that unmistakable sensation again, that patriotic spirit, and was ready to throw away the life that I have built since, and dive straight back into the war zone, if only I could get hold of an AK-47.
It is a terrible feeling that I wish on no one, to witness first hand the loss of one's country.
tflex
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