At this time of year the weather can vary a lot here in the rainforests of Darkest Wiltshire. Today the morning began with chilly fog - it's lifting already as I speak - and yesterday we had bright sunshine which left me sweating despite the cool air. Taking a stroll around Coate Water I was struck by how Meditteranean the water was, a nice shade of blue, enlivened by silvery reflections off the ripples caused by the waterfowl on the water and the dog chasing them away from the bank. Usually the
The British weather is an endless source of comment. When you want to start a conversation in Britain, you always begin by asking how good or bad the weather has been of late. Yes, it's been pretty good these last couple of days. Hot sun, light winds, but yesterday afternoon?
It poured with rain. Those unlucky enough to still be out and about trudged past my home in a state of abject misery, their clothes two shades darker and dripping wet. I do have sympathy of course. I've been caught out
After a week of intensive forklifting that saw me spending most of it twiddling my thumbs in a dingy office, I can finally relax a little. Truth is I'm shocked how tiring I found it. Getting up early, walking to and fro from work, leaping on and off heavy and potentially dangerous industrial machinery, and worst of all, braving the queues at the local fast food takeaways for lunch.
KFC weren't bad I suppose. They did point me toward the 'loser corner' seeing as I look like a neanderthal in a
Those lads have done a grand job painting the outside of the house. For me the best thing is that they've run out of Perry Como songs, but at least the paint looks fresh.
They did carefully lay out dayglo 'wet paint' tape everywhere to stop people getting paint all over their clothes, which sort of made the place look like a crime scene. And since it was necessary to leave the outer door open last night (to avoid the wet paint gluing the door and keeping me trapped inside) some wag decided t
"Trust Sicknote to get in the way... Should have stayed in bed..." Muttered AM as he shuffled past on his crutches. Was that comment directed at me? AM doesn't like me very much. Back in the days when the library was at its temporary hut, he had his favourite PC and used to bully people off it when he came in. He tried that with me once... "Come on, Mate, didn't you see my name on the screen?" No, I didn't, because it wasn't there and I couldn't have logged on if it was. And then I had to repeat
Some ago a religious leader decided that nations should submit to the authority of his faith. National leaders who opposed his initiatives were blacklisted, denied their spiritual welfare. The common people were enticed to believe without question what their priests were telling them. It all happened nine hundred years ago and resulted in the first crusades.
Sometimes I watch Russia Today on television. Not because of any communist sympathy, but simply because you get a different viewpoint t
Swindon is renowned for it's dreary wet weather and today our unusual run of sunny mornings turned into a damp squib of a day. It's hard to describe how the mood in our rainy old borough changes when it gets wet because basically it doesn't. People are the same, apart from being possibly a little less drunk. So let me take you by the hand and lead you through the aisles upstairs, and I'll tell you something that will finally make up your mind...
Highlights of the Day
1 - Caldrail singing "M
There are certain things in life that you know aren't entirely sincere but you do them all the same, such as buying cars, watching party political broadcasts, going to church, or reading horoscopes. Sometimes you just can't help yourself.
I glanced at my horoscope this morning and this is what I read...
Have you been thinking about writing an article of some sort, perhaps involving travel or a fascinating new field? If so, Libra, you might want to start it today. Your creative juices are
Some years ago I wrote a piece on another site condemning the European Union as a dictatorship in the making. Not necessarily because it is at the moment, so to speak, but because its construction lays the groundwork for those those wishing to rule without accountability.
I had said that Ireland would be forced to ratify the Treaty of Lisbon regardless of their previous vote - as the recent pressure on them demonstrates. There was also an interesting letter in the local paper this morning f
It's a sunny morning, a clear blue sky, so I thought I'd drop by the park and enjoy the sunshine. There was hardly anyone around but eventually this old guy hobbled to the edge of the lake and deposited half a loaf of bread in the water. The nearby ducks eagerly paddled after this awesome prize and began tugging at the sodden excess of white loaf with relish. To them, it was a veritable feast.
Over the lake was a flock of seabirds. Small white ones, petrels I think, though I'm sure I'm wrong
The first battle has taken place and if I were honest, I didn't do too well. I'd warned my claims advisor that I was upgrading to a noble title, a statement she treated with polite dismissal, and when she called me Mister Caldrail - Well, I was duty bound to put her straight.
Unfortunately, she isn't impressed, and rather pointedly refused to change it unless I provided evidence. I duly returned an hour later with the necessary documentation and guess what? She was busy. Sounds to me like a ce
Woolworths are closing. After nearly a century of trading on the High Street the grand old name is to vanish, unless someone pulls a rescue package together. London and Rochdale sites have already laid off staff, and it won't be long before the Swindon site does too. Somehow I doubt I'll get a job there anyway - I know of manager of old and she doesn't want me working there - but with hundreds of warehouse personnel on the market my job search isn't getting any easier.
Weather Report
Our fi
Now that I've been unemployed for a year, I must face the Inquisition. It's a ritual designed to help me get back to work, though to be honest, it rarely makes any difference. They change a few conditions on my jobseekers contract and send me to a special unit where I can learn how to be a jobseeker again.
There were a few us waiting for interviews. A woman walked up and asked if we were in the right place. The guy opposite me looked puzzled. "In the right place..." He mumbled, staring empt
Amongst the crop of job adverts I've had to trawl through this week is a remarkable chance to be Country Manager in Denmark. They want a new ruler who can increase their market share. So if you want to blitzkrieg Europe at the command of the Danish armed forces apply now.
Of course armed forces need fuel. I was interested to discover a vacancy for an oil company in Kyrgyzstan. Managing a pileline in some forgotten corner of the world doesn't strike me as an exciting opportunity, though it w
I don't often cook meals late in the day but last night it occured to me I hadn't eaten much and sure enough an unfamiliar and uncomfortable sensation was making itself felt in my belly. Okay, lets see what I've got in the cupboards... What's this?... A beef and ale pie?... Hey, I'd forgotten I had this and I'm in the mood. Bang that in the oven for thirty minutes at 230deg and prepare myself a feast.
What I hadn't realised was that my antiquaited cooker is in fact nuclear powered. It cooked
What a gloomy day. It just is. Waking up this morning after the christmnas season is a test of resolve to begin with without a grey, drab day to persuade you that sleeping in is a better idea.
News From The Drab Grey Town
Despite appearances to the contrary, a quick survey of the newspaper headlines reveals an armed robbery on a newsagent in Pinehurst. That area is one of the three 'P's of Swindon (Pinehurst, Penhill, and Park), our local sinkhole estates that taxi drivers refused to deliv
Just a moment ago I was browsing the local newspapers local hiustory page. It's a regular feature in which we learn fascinating trivia about life in Swindon in times gone by. I was a little suprised by todays entry, concerning the result of bad behaviour in a late victorian school.
Some lads had misbehaved and received corporal punishment for their misdemeanours. The parents complained and the kids got thrown out, getting their revenge by pelting the headmaster with vegetables and threateni
For years Swindon has been a byword for Victorian pidgeon nests. Our 19th Century legacy has survived in all sorts of quiet corners around the town. For the most part, these brick edifices were as rundown and abandoned as their inhabitants. Yet as shabby as it was, it leant a certain character to the place. In recent years, I've wandered around the town taking photographs. The interesting patina of urban decay is simply wonderfully photogenic. The industrial archaeology alone is worth two gigaby
There was a time when music store assistants smiled when I entered their shop. That was back in the eighties of course, when money was easily had and quickly spent, and a time when we were more prosperous even if we didn't know or felt it so. Whereas once all I seemed to do was buy things, all I seem to do now is repair things, or rather pay someone else to.
Last night I got the call from the music store to tell me my latest repair job was ready for collection. That particular box of tricks
It was just another day in rain soaked Swindon. A lorry rumbled past, bouncing on the road surface with loud rattles, spraying water on the faceless citizens scurrying from place to place. This is one tough town, where only the driest survive. Who knows? Maybe some mysterious dame will walk through my door and complicate my life. It was not to be. An impersonal text message arrived on my phone. SBD will collect your faulty laptop today between 07:00 and 20:00.
Oh? I wasn't informed about th
It always happens when it snows. I get this uncontrollable urge to wander further afield. Okay, that doesn't make me Ranulph Caldrail, but trudging through snow is pretty tiring you know.
First stop of the day was at the park round the corner from where I live. You know, I was always taught that birds fly south for the winter, but not these hardy waterfowl, especially since they've cottoned on that we humans feel sorry for them and supply all their breadcrumb needs. All they have to do is sw
Last night I sat back to watch a little tv. In both senses. Outside I heard a revving car engine and tire squeals. Oh come on you idiot, surely you're not pratting around in this weather? Sheesh...
Later I became aware of a persistent rumble. I get that from big diesel engines idling outside by the pedestrian crossing. Except this time it just went on and on. Its uncomfortable because the vibration carries through the house. Looking out the window I spotted why. The single decker bus outside
Tony Blair once told us that he wanted everyone in Britain with an internet connecrtion. Now Gordon Brown is proclaiming "The Digital Revolution" and telling us that he sees the internet as an essential part of life, as much as basic services like gas, electricity, and water. The government sees this internet growth as part of their plan for recovery from the recession.
Well that's nice isn't it? Ordering breakfast by email to the missus, sending that spreadsheet to the kids so they know wha
KS plays football three nights a week. He sports a 'hard boy' shaven head. He spends ten miniutes every morning covering every inch and fold with 'man-spray'. He's dated almost every young lady employed at this department store. Whilst he hasn't advertised the fact, he also took a short video of himself in the Dungeon sparring with a cardboard box. Quite the young man isn't he?
I had to laugh. Today he was given to Mrs T as her personal assistant. She's a mature lady who clearly wasn't going
This getting out of bed lark is starting to annoy me. Time was when I didn't mind, always rushing about to go here and there, but now? Another trek across Swindon for a doctors appointment.
Today they were going to give me a blood test. I suspect that has something to do with extracting a sample of the stuff, and since my body was designed by nature to keep all the precious red fluid inside, I also suspect some sort of puncture is required. Oh well. No pain, no gain.
So I booked in and w
