Obituary.
Entry posted by Gaius Octavius
3,570 views
Since I make fun of everyone, here's one on me:
PORCOFACIO UNSCRUPULATO
San Francisco contractor, Porcofacio Unscrupulato, 68, of Canale Capone, North Beach, died yesterday from injuries he received in the collapse of a building he was inspecting, prior to sale to Roosevelt Moses of Oakland.
Born in Molto Pubisco, Italy, Unscrupulato was brought to this country at age 11 by his parents, Regurgito and Nauseata Unscrupulato.
Active for many years in community affairs, Unscrupulato took time from his early employment with the Strangulata Cesspool Cleaning and Catering Co. to appear in local nightclubs, performing a knife-throwing act with the late Inadverto Castrato. Prior to his death, Unscrupulato was president of the Insubstante Construction Co., which he operated with his brother, Devio.
Unscrupulato was a member of the Federated Sons of Sicily, Luciano Chapter, The Putrido Chianti and Marching Society, Crococitto's Fine Arts and Bocci Club, Insanitario's Pizzeria Bowling Team, and past president of the North Beach Enforcer Protection Benevolent Society and Garden Club.
He is survived by his wife, Inconsolata; sons Retardo, Cretino, Imbecilico and Faggotini: daughters Ovaria, Fallopia and Orgasma; sisters Mrs, Mammaria Penduloso, Mrs. Prolifica Fornicata and Mrs. Conspicua Testiculata; and 17 grandchildren, all of the Canale Capone address.
The Rev. Celibato Infortunato of Santo Buffone R.C. Church will offer a solemn requiem Mass Wednesday, following services at the Rigorio-Mortisco Funeral Home and Excavating Co. Internment will be in Addio Basta Cemetery.
Love the local weekly newspapers.
10 Comments
Recommended Comments